Fetish Fails #1

Events that would be Erroneous to Eroticize

Events we may call the “Fetish Fails”

Fetish Fail #1:

The Fin-Con

For those with a proclivity towards the Sexual Fetish of Financial Domination, they may assume that Fin-Con stands for a Financial Con, as in a Financial Con-Artist. Well, that would be an erroneous assumption. Today, the ‘Con’ in Fin-Con stands for “Consolidation”; yes, Financial Consolidation, as in one NOT shelling out their portfolio for pleasure.

Fail4Thus, we are brought to the point, the past of certain person we’ll call Peter…

As a young man (i.e. still in schooling), Peter was pretty… um… well, he was just pretty plain, pretty normal; average blending in Mr. Joe Schmo kind of man that-is. There wasn’t much that you can say that he was or wasn’t, but if there was one thing that you could say he was not, it was a ladies man. Despite not being gay, guys was all that he knew outside of the vanilla porn that he watched during his personal play time.

Even though the girls didn’t notice him, he sure noticed the girls. But his level of interaction with them was more-or-less merely left to dreamland. But one day, while in classes, Peter put his brazen foot forward. He took a deep, dramatized breath, strutted across the classroom with bold determination (with a look that was probably pretty creepy, if not scary, when seen from a bystanders perspective), and halted his march in front of his main objective:Fail5 the creme of the genetic female crop of the class. Before the fact, I’ll say, granted, to say that Peter hadn’t thought this plan through would be one of the century’s largest understatements. In hindsight, even he could only describe the battle-plan as unbelievably asinine; one worthy of a World Dunce-Award. The fact that Peter is borderline genius furthers the idea that book-smarts doesn’t equal social-skills (per-se). So, what was it that Mr. Dunce did after being before the beauty of his blunder? Without rhyme, without reason, without explanation nor exclamation, the dope simultaneously asked her out AND offered her money! If he would have done the one, no harm done. If he would have done the other on its own, it could have been the birth of a Financial-Dominatrix. But doing both with virtually no separation in between was likened onto the moronic act of a wanna-be ‘Pimp’! How in any rational realm that plan was supposed to go well is beyond me. But, some star among the heavens must have favored poor Peter… evidenced by the fact that he wasn’t seeing stars right afterwards. The girl was a good sport, in that she (with an expected, though minimalist, snooty tone & expression) quite softly brushed him off with a simple decline. And so it went… one would think; but no, it escalated on Peter’s side of things. Oy. Being his first brazen boast of actualized confidence, paired with it likewise being his biggest blunder, the combo obviously didn’t mingle kindly; rather the brew busted a bit of his brain. Like poking a priest one to many times, something was bound to break, and sure enough, it did. Peter flew into a fit of brainless rage! The money itself became the focus of his frustrated embarrassment… thankfully. He made a b-line towards the nearest trashcan, shredded the cash with fingers acting like some wood-chipper, and deposited the tidbits of confetti (cash changed into kindling per-se) soundly into the receptacle. If that heroine of this horror tale would have happily taken the money, or rather ripped it from his sweaty palms, it may have been the birth of a fetish; the point in time where yet another man became inflicted with the Financial-Domination (FinDom) Fetish. Yet instead it was the Failure of a Fetish, the opposite coming to fruition. Fail1Due to that dumb disaster, the only Financial Domination that involves Peter is where HE is the Dominate’r! Paying for sexual gratification, or deriving pleasure from spending, was the furthest thing from Peter’s Sexuality. In fact, the thought of spending large sums of money for sex would erode any erection for him immediately. But, just as many things become eroticized by the aroused male P… Psyche, Peter’s Penis found a way to do the happy dance for this psychosexual blooper… THE CHEAPER, THE BETTER! That’s right… Peter’s sexuality directed towards the dirt-cheap; the literal bottom of the barrel. To him, sex should be something sold at Dollar General. If a high-class escort quoted him $1,000 an hour, he’d reverse the charges on the cost of the phone call. But if a street-wandering scavenger asked for a $2 thing of liquor in exchange, his zipper would rip open. (But even then he’d make sure to haggle that price down.) Fail3If he was one who took to Phone Sex, he would most definitely be on the world-wide PSO’s Blacklist of Broke Bastards (so-to-speak). But pay in mind that he was not a penniless man, rather keeping to hoard every penny possible. Truly would Peter be a Financial-Dominatrix’s Antichrist.

Fetish Fails #1 was last modified: December 22nd, 2015 by Therapist Summers
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